Sometimes she annoys me so much.
When she fusses over my successes and my failures. Clearly affected more than I am
When she doesn’t understand that I won’t starve if I delay having lunch or don’t have it at all
Why does she have to let go of things she doesn’t need to, sacrifice where its not needed, hold on tight when its not required
When she shares that big piece of pastry I bought so lovingly just for her. Like she does for me, just to see her face light up having her favorite treat. She doesn’t understand what it means to me.
She doesn’t understand that I care for her. I want her to rest and she doesn’t need to slog in the kitchen to make that special dish for us.
She is a lot more than that, than anything. But she doesn’t understand
She doesn’t need to forgive when I am wrong. It escalates my guilt.
Why can’t she let me ease just a little pain from her tired feet. Its where my paradise lies.
Why for once she can’t be happy regardless of me. I try my best to remember what Allah says about treating parents but its always too late.
Why doesn’t she understand that I want her to find peace. The peace that she needs. I just wish someday she finds Him as He is and loves Him more than I ever could, more than she loves me. I want the best for her but she just doesn’t understand.
She says “Why is God so harsh on my kids?” I wish I could tell her how generous He has been.
I wish she could see that I love her so much, just likes she loves me. But she won’t understand.
But the sad part is may be I am the one who doesn’t understand that her highest need is to see me happy. What I am is because of how she raised me.
I am the one who doesn’t get it and I am anxious about the day I’ll be in her shoes and I finally do.
Dedicated to my mother who I love so so very much and am thankful for everyday. May Allah SWT bless her with His light and path and grant her the highest level of paradise. Ameen